Sunday night I had so many dreams and they were all mashed up like some crazy movie sequence where the drug addict is going through detox. The one part that really sticks out in my mind was the first lucid sequence where I was a zoo keeper in Haiti and I had to figure out how to save the animals and get them transported to another zoo. Absolute chaos surrounded me and all I could think of was, where is the tiger? Where are the elephants? Are they okay? How are we going to get them to another zoo? I wonder if it will be cleared up in dreamland tonight...
I found out in therapy last night that what I thought was an unreasonable dislike towards blondes in SUVs is actually not unprecedented. The discussion began because of a new friend at work and my suspicions of her wanting to be friends with me. The story I made up is that she is the captain of the cheerleading squad, I am a drama geek. Maybe I have been watching too much Glee? If you are an adult working in an office with men and women and there are more than 20 0f you, there is a good chance that the high school vibe will permeate at some point, right? I mean, it's just natural for groups to form and people to find their groups and stick to them. It's also easier for me to categorize people and remember them by the groups they are in. sales = cheerleaders/football team, developers = chess club, hr/accounting/tech = principal, administration, school nurse and so on. I made her a cheerleader. I already had some harbored anger towards blonde women driving SUVs and who else would that cheerleader be all grown up and so the distrust carries over. The story is that they have perfect lives with perfect children and husbands where all they have to do is cart the kiddies back and forth in their weekend warrior mobiles all the while making hair/facial/nail appointments (which is why they are on the phone every single time I see them) after working out with hot personal trainers for two hours everyday. Whether I am being courageous or obvious about my deep seeded jealousy for these fellow sisters, I do not know.
So I have dinner with her, I hang out with her and it turns out that we have so much more in common than I thought. We have both been through some pretty tough times these past few years. She is a real person with real problems and has been screwed over and hurt just as much as the next gal. Which is not to say that if she were the aforementioned lady that I would not be friends with her (or that she doesn't have a set of problems of her own) it's just that I wouldn't have a good chance of running into her all that often - okay, maybe at the salon. Then it occurred to me that maybe she wants to be friends with me because I am gorgeous, thin, smart and blonde, too! Okay, maybe I'm not, but obviously we are not in high school, I am a cool lady, and when it comes down to it, there are not a lot of women where I work, she is new, and she just wants someone to hang out with that will not a) hit on her and 2) be accepting and real - I can do that. I'm a pro. So the categories fade and the suspicion dissipates and then it just becomes to fabulous ladies, having some wine, talking about work and trying to get along in this big old world...
I found out in therapy last night that what I thought was an unreasonable dislike towards blondes in SUVs is actually not unprecedented. The discussion began because of a new friend at work and my suspicions of her wanting to be friends with me. The story I made up is that she is the captain of the cheerleading squad, I am a drama geek. Maybe I have been watching too much Glee? If you are an adult working in an office with men and women and there are more than 20 0f you, there is a good chance that the high school vibe will permeate at some point, right? I mean, it's just natural for groups to form and people to find their groups and stick to them. It's also easier for me to categorize people and remember them by the groups they are in. sales = cheerleaders/football team, developers = chess club, hr/accounting/tech = principal, administration, school nurse and so on. I made her a cheerleader. I already had some harbored anger towards blonde women driving SUVs and who else would that cheerleader be all grown up and so the distrust carries over. The story is that they have perfect lives with perfect children and husbands where all they have to do is cart the kiddies back and forth in their weekend warrior mobiles all the while making hair/facial/nail appointments (which is why they are on the phone every single time I see them) after working out with hot personal trainers for two hours everyday. Whether I am being courageous or obvious about my deep seeded jealousy for these fellow sisters, I do not know.
So I have dinner with her, I hang out with her and it turns out that we have so much more in common than I thought. We have both been through some pretty tough times these past few years. She is a real person with real problems and has been screwed over and hurt just as much as the next gal. Which is not to say that if she were the aforementioned lady that I would not be friends with her (or that she doesn't have a set of problems of her own) it's just that I wouldn't have a good chance of running into her all that often - okay, maybe at the salon. Then it occurred to me that maybe she wants to be friends with me because I am gorgeous, thin, smart and blonde, too! Okay, maybe I'm not, but obviously we are not in high school, I am a cool lady, and when it comes down to it, there are not a lot of women where I work, she is new, and she just wants someone to hang out with that will not a) hit on her and 2) be accepting and real - I can do that. I'm a pro. So the categories fade and the suspicion dissipates and then it just becomes to fabulous ladies, having some wine, talking about work and trying to get along in this big old world...
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